Have you been accredited yet Mr Phil??

Accredited stamp

"You love us, EBU, you really love us"

Well it's that time of year when the so-called fan press panics about how many of them are going to be accredited. A time when many normal people will say: "but you're not press..." And how many times will I check my e-mail every day to see?

Luckily, however, the British Broadcasting Corporation took *me* by surprise by accrediting me for the fifteenth time in the last seventeen years without me having to check my email once. This means, once again, you lot get to read all the usual shite, tell me I'm wrong, lap up the irreverence and ... generally, see Eurovision from a non-fawning point of view!  They've also accredited Monty which is excellent news and, I hear, Riigi has snuck under the Ukrainian radar and is  making an appearance ... if you can catch him.

Usual rules apply, naturally, but for the new people among you, let's just go over them again, shall we?

  1. It's very unlikely we'll tell you everything is great. This is most important because, frankly, we're not eurovision.tv or wiwi or any other of the populist websites. They are great if you want to know what kind of socks Kooit Toome wears and to read interviews about Laura's hair style et al. But we wanna know about the songs and performances. The reviews of the songs and stuff are written from a televoter perspective. Televoters show bias. And so will we.
  2.  We're not "real" journalists! Something may have already told you this but, shocker, we ain't!! This'll mean we have lives and stuff too and, more importantly, it's our holiday. Expect more than a faint whiff of sarcasm, a healthy dose of funny stuff (weird and funny ha-ha) and a dose of realism.
  3. We probably will offend you.  I won't apologise for that ... or indeed the tone that our writing takes. If we offend your favourite country and you feel compelled to tell us, that's fine, but be constructive. If there are people that mail in or use the contact form to have a go directly, don't be surprised if your name and email address appears on the site.  I've done it before, and it just means everyone get to laugh at you.

You might not like what we serve on our menu, so please feel free to delve into the smorgasbord of other websites out there. I'm sure they satisfy your palette, but if you like it fun and perfer a site that doesn't take itself seriously, feel free to take a seat for two weeks of cheese, Vodka, substandard music, terrible puns but most of all FUN!