And La France

Franko: Here we go again. Another song I actually like that’s given an unremarkable presentation and likely to finish in the bottom five. There’s nothing actually WRONG with it and I applaud France for trying something different much like last year, but it’s fate is going to be quite similar to last year’s French entry. He rides onto the stage in a golf buggy and meanders his way through the song. There is a quieter, slower bit about two thirds in but that’s the only bit of variety in the whole damn thing. I found myself glancing at the BBC website during his performance and I’m not entirely sure viewers won’t be equally distracted if not popping off to the lav or making a cuppa. The only advantage that it has over Germany is it’s position in the draw, but it’s a moot point as to which will get the wooden spoon. He doesn’t have the girl power factor of Germany with his long flowing mane and scabby beard. Again there’s nothing wrong with it, it just isn’t right…. sadly.

Nick: I’ve had worries about how Sebastien Tellier‘s style of music might translate into an arena where all vocals must be performed live, and it’s like this, really – a backing choir of five who stand there going “bap-bap-ba-da-da-dap” like bit part players in The Muppet Show, and turn the thing into a laughing stock in the first ten seconds. It’s dead in the water before you even set eyes on Sebastien. It’s absolutely impossible to take seriously.

And that’s before you even see the golf buggy.I hope that listeners to the Jo Whiley show aren’t too upset.

Phil: France passes me by, unfortunately. He (Sebastian, I am told) – enters the stage on a Golf Buggy, not looking unlike TV’s Mr Roy Delaney (who has been mysterious by his absence today …). It just doesn’t do anything for me and I’d suggest it’ll be the same for the voting public. It feels forgettable. and stops and starts in all the wrong places … It makes me annoyed that La France clearly tried to get a star into their selection – at last – and this is all they could come up with. Now I know this is what he does, but even so … It’s out of place in this contest, and that in itself is worrying. Eurovision is not ready for progressive muzak. I heard and watched a mash of nothingness – unfortunately BUT it helps the UK to the not coming last!

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