Vanja Radovanović

Just like on Wednesday, this catches me in my rehearsal lull, where energy levels are low and I'm start to wonder why I'm still at this fecking contest ...

Come next Thursday, I feel that the burgers of Europe will be so mentally drained by the gallons of batshit on offer, that by the time Captain Blue from Captain Scarlett comes on screen, their bladders will explode and Europe will enjoy a collective toilet break.

There's nothing wrong with this (if this is your bag and many people have done things that are similar), but Vanja still doesn't look at the camera or indeed connect with anyone other than the so far non-existant audience. This is a problem.It makes the whole thing look like it has been badly shot and, I fear, that's what Europe will see and pass the song by.

The boy and his backing singers can sing, but that's going to count for nought when the points roll in.

Image Credits: Andres Putting.