Czech

So, the basic premise of this song can be summed up in a few words: Mikolas's significant other is playing away, but he don't care!

It is three minutes of pure dirt, talking about 'dripping on wood' and playing with his 'wood bamboo' and 'eating his spaghetti' - it's more Carry on Czechia than a Eurovision Song. Where are Hattie Jacques and Kenneth Williams when you need them? (matron, take them away!!)

However, when you get past all the goddam filth, it's a very very good song. The Czech Republic has hardly had a sparkling record when it comes to the contest, but, finally, the penny has dropped that a good pop song will always do business with televoters and juries.

It's well-written musically - with a good structure that juries will lap up, and while the lyrics have had to be changed for the appropriate audience (and, ftr that's the only decision that had to be made) - the two lines that have been changed have not diminished the product at all.

There will be a lot of stuff going on in the stage performance you can bet, gyrating and dancing and lots of suggestiveness, but the result will be better than Milkmaids from Poland! - and to me that smacks of double standards!!

Is this qualifying - Oh hell yes.

Is it good enough to win? - No, because there are stronger songs in the contest this year and this is somewhat one-dimensional and lacks that depth that a winning song has - in my opinion - but as a piece of light popular music on a Saturday night, it'll resonate with everyone. Expect Top 10 and don't be surprised if it's Top 5.

Phil's Score - Douze points!