Jessika

My my my, San Marino courtesy of Malta, Germany via Bratislava give the ‘what the actual fuck’ moment this year and certainly will have you racing for your wine and stifling your guffaws next Thursday.  

Jessica starts wearing a black hooded cape before a ‘limp’ reveal of a white t-shirt and sparkly gold jacket. The robots are back and smaller and plonked atop plinths at the the front of the stage, one alone on the left and three together on the right. As Jenie B raps her way in sporting a cerise jacket, the camera picks out the three dancing and it’s one of the most ridiculous things I have ever seen EVER! The robot stage left is holding various signs including “I’m not your robot”, a jibe at Israel, and “will you marry me?” 

The vocals are strained and I have to say that Jessica’s face cannot hide the pure embarrassment and bewilderment knowing she chose to sign herself up for this in the first place. The only positives I can take from this are the long shots as the chorus breaks and the cluster of fans at the back, I’ll need cooling down after my fit of giggles. 

Image Credits: Thomas Hanses.