Phil Explains Eurovision 2016 – 26th to 21st

Minus One at a Meet & Greet during the Eurovision Song Contest 2016 in Stockholm.
Minus One at a Meet & Greet during the Eurovision Song Contest 2016 in Stockholm.

26th Germany. 11 Points

This is one of the easier explanations I will have to give this year. It really *is* that bad. It’s a song of no quality sung by someone that the televoters laughed at because she looked “quirky” – How about writing a decent song first rather than going for a look.

25th Czech Republic – 41 Points

And from one of the easiest, to one of the most complicated. This looked and sounded great and as the 41 points shows, the Juries thought it was above average but the televoters didn’t connect with her or vice versa and as such, a big fat 0 (23rd best on the Televoter average). Perhaps they just saw a dirge who knows…

24th United Kingdom – 62 Points

Thankfully this result doesn’t reflect the reality of the song. Joe and Jake sung and wrung every point out of this, the jury score was the highest we have had for years, meaning that we get what it is to write a good song, but 8 televote points suggest that staging wise and visuals and memorability, we still have a way to go. But it’s getting there.

23rd Croatia – 73 Points
This is a cracking song, spoilt mostly by the “Vision” bit in the title of the competition. If this was a radio contest without looking at her two hideous dresses, Europe would certainly have ranked this higher.

22nd Spain – 77 Points
Flattering to deceive as all Spanish songs do, this one is no different. Barrei failed because the song just wasn’t strong enough. It appealed to it’s usual constituency (Spaniards) but everyone else saw through this.

21st Cyprus – 96 Points
Just too shouty for Europe to pick the phone up. They are not used to rock in this competition and whilst this was a huge slice of schalger tailored rock,

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8 years ago

Germany – I am going to disagree with you on that one. It is actually a good song, ruined by the visuals. You close your eyes and listen and you hear a radio friendly song with a good built up and some very interesting undertones. There was a mismatch between the song and the visuals which was its downfall. Add to that that in the final it was squeeze between 2 of the favourites and you get the last place of this year. She remained true to herself and ruined any chance the song may had and the song does deserve better.

Czech republic- starting at 02nd place, didn’t bode well for its chances. Lucky for the song, the juries saw a song performed well and rewarded it a bit. On the juries alone she would have been 16 or 17. Nevertheless, the best result for the Czech in Eurovision.

UK – Juries wise it was well received. Respectable 16/17 with the juries is quite good in UK standard. Next time make sure the televote agree with them and you get even a better result.

Croatia – She was off key in part of the songs and the dress got more attention than the song. At least she can have comfort in the Barbara Dex award, though that’s not much to be proud off.

Spain – This going to do well in Eurovision parties in coming years. it also has potential to be a summer hit. Just a shame that when performing this life she didn’t have a decent backing singers who should have done a better job in backing her.Is it to much to ask that the backing singers will sing in tune?

Cyprus – Georgia was seen as more credible rock song and probably was better live than they were. Juries’ wise, Georgia was almost double the points than Cyprus(80 to 43). In the televote it was the other way around.