The Swedish entry is chosen by SVT. Sweden has taken part since 1958 and won seven times.
Oh Dear – Eric Saade‘s third rehearsal – so to speak -sounded somewhat breathy towards the end for my liking – I don’t think that he has the stamina or the vocal ability to do everything that the staging demands of him to be honest.
I suspect it’ll just about scrape through to the final, but it need big big improvements if it is going to do anything at all in the final.
Yes we’re back after another night of scabby food and beer at the Euroclub. How are you this morning?
Ralph: feeling a bit ruff
Drashig: hale and hearty
Ralph: you stink Drashig, when are you going to have a bath?
Drashig: I had a douche from Walter.
Ralph: that’s not quite the same thing.
Franko: shall we get on….
Bosnia
AS near as possible a reworking of the national final performance except that only two of them seem to use the stage, Dino and the trumpet player. The others look like someone super-glued their shoes to the left hand side of the stage and they can’t move. It’s Bosnia and it’s catchy which is probably all it needs to get to the final
Ralph and Drashig: Dino? does that mean he’s got lots of bones?
verdict: surefire qualifier
Austria
There’s never been any doubt that the girl could sing but is the song just a bit too Disney to do well and drawn second? She appears to be standing on the Koh-i-noor so could be looking to make a quick getaway after the peformance. The unflattering black smock and haircut make her look like she’s been hanging out with Good King Wenseslas. Some care needed there I think.
R&D: Is this a new kind of dog whistle? We quite like it.
Verdict: would like to say yes but I think she wasted her fare.
Netherlands
They obviously couldn’t be bothered to dress up. It’s almost identical for me to Love Bugs that sang for Switzerland 3 years ago. And like that (nice though it is) it’s the sort of song and band that can easily accidentally not qualify.
R&D: Bet their nether regions smell worse than ours.
verdict: sorry but no cigars
Belgium
I’m happy to say that this sounds awful. I want to hurt them and every smug bone in their bodies. I dearly want them to die in a horrible, painful accident. If I end up anywhere near them I won’t be responsible for my actions as blood will be shed.
R&D: kill kill kill kill
verdict: without love
Slovkia
I’m happy to report that the Twiins can sing and the presentation of the song isn’t quite as cutesy as I feared. Stick with things the way they are and there’s hope for Slovakia’s first appearance in the final for 13 years.
R&D: what are those two round shapes they’ve both got on their fronts?
verdict: still hopes of a Bratislava spring
Ukraine
I’ve always thought that this was a dead cert to qualify and probably top ten when it gets there. The vocals are spot on and Ukraine always put on a show. The sand woman is fascinating but I keep expecting Mika to yell “f**k off bitch this is my song”. Having a huge pair of arms meandering across the backdrop is just plain weird and makes me think of Gullivers Travels. Less said about the dress of the sand woman, the better.
R&D: Don’t hit us big lady
verdict: pay no attention to the woman behind the curtain
Moldova
And talking of weird. A uni-cycling trumpet player? That’s just showing off. Moldova clearly haven’t forgiven them for not winning with Grandma 6 years ago and have made them all wear dunces hats. The visuals in the background are impressive though and fit in with the general mayhem.
R&D: we’ve got no idea what’s going on
verdict: wouldn’t bet against it on their reputation but blimey….
Sweden
General consensus is that this didn’t go well and I wouldn’t be sorry. However much as the glass breaking stunt didn’t come off, I did think the vocals weren’t as bad as people were making out. There’s much more mileage in this unfortunately. I’m getting the same vibe about it that I did about the Russian and Greek debacle back in 2008 and look what happened to both of them…..
R&D: We said we wanted a bone not a boner…
verdict: almost certainly top 5
Cyprus
WTF? Now I like this song but there are some strange things going on here. A woman swinging what appears to be a ball and chain and tied up with rope. I’ve heard the phrase “money for old rope” but this taking things too far….The graphics seem to be killer gemstones which are slowly creeping up on our singer and moving in for the attack as well as a lot of balloons on sticks. I’m not sure what the symbolism is but it is quite striking. The boys seem to have borrowed Sakis’s foot clamps from a couple of years ago.
R&D: It’s making my head hurt
verdict: sorry not a chance. Back to not qualifying.
Sweden ARE going to get another First rehearsal. I am hearing that because the glass didn’t break on his last runthrough they have been granted a completely new first rehearsal session of another 40 minutes on Friday as well as their 2nd rehearsal of 30 mins on Saturday. Expect delegations not to be happy about this decision. *I* am not happy about this decision to be honest – surely thats what 2nd rehearsals are there for?!
This is going to run and run!
**edit** – I now hear word it’s going to be a behind closed doors rehearsal after Jedward this evening.
It was suggested his song and performance were camp and appealed to a gay audience and he was asked if this was on purpose or if it is coincidence because he is gay as well. He answered it was a coincidence! Then he said he was not gay and …the dance moves were choreographed by one of the best choreographers in Sweden.
Saade was also asked if Sparrow had invited him to the Russian and if he wanted to comment on that. Saade replied that that had already been answered and he did not wish to discuss it again.
Saade said Eurovision was only a small part of his life and he has others things to come this year including the release of his second solo album.
He was asked to name his favourite Swedish entry besides Waterloo to which he replied Waterloo was one of his favourites and he was put on the spot and could not think of any others. Then he named The Ark. Someone in the audience suggested Carola and he said he did not like and there was a gasp in the room. He said he could not sing The Worrying Kind as he did not know the lyrics but he said he could sing Popular. The person who had asked the question suggested he sing Manboy. He said he could not sing it as his backing singers do not know it so he would sing Popular. He sang it and Björkman joined in.
It’s official – Sweden are imploding. After an eventful rehearsal they’ve postponed the press conference to a time yet to be determined, and cancelled all interviews. All we need now is no more merciful beheadings and it’ll be like Alan Rickman’s Sherriff of Nottingham is in the building. A merciful beheading might not be such a bad thing though, maybe directed at the fool who forgot to leave Eric Saade enough room to get out of his glass box. It made for a very mirthful time in the press centre, i can tell you.
Moldova is today’s marking mad entry. A very pretty girl, in a winged tutu and traffic cone, on a unicycle, blowing a bugle is the highlight of that song. And it’s daft enough to make your typical Irish housewife pick up the phone and wote wote wote.
Cyprus is stunning – absolutely stunning. Watch it if you can, and fail to be impressed at your peril. That is sailing through to the final, or my name isn’t… erm… Riigimetnik.
I’ve had a request for some more food porn. I can tell you that the porn of the cake and cheese variety here in the Dorf are very easy on the eye, and must be shared with the rest of the blogosphere. I realise that means we move away from the creaky old Eurovision bandwagon. But it’s what we do, and one of the things you just don’t get at other blogs. Other blog type things are always available for your delectation and delight. They may stay on message, but they ain’t half as much fun.
As far as we know, dear reader, the first EVER Swiss party happens tonight. Oneurope will have a presence there, to bring you all the news, and to see if the Sparrow dances on the bar again. If he does it while I’m waiting for a €5 beer, I won’t be a happy bunny.
R
Or so I gather, anyway. I wouldn’t know myself of course, there are even rumours that some people like to hear what we’ve got to say about participants in some SongFestival or other. Unfounded, I’m sure!
Just in case, however, I’ve taken the trouble to watch some recent rehearsal footage smuggled out from the arena in a crate of Knockwurst sausages. It’s explosive stuff!
Cyprus, for example, is astonishing onlookers by being really, really quite good. I’d only heard and not seen it before now, and it had passed me by, but it’s now showing up all class and impressiveness and authenticity. It’s very, very Hellenic, like a long slow Sti Fotia with all the trimmings. Shouldn’t likey, but likey a lot. Not too much extra work needed on this one if the TV cameras are shooting in the right directions at the right times.
Sweden… not so much. Still, Chanee and Wotsisface managed to recover from worse rehearsals than this to end up really quite respectably on the final scoreboard, so I’m marking this down as an “It’s told me sod all” rehearsal.
No signs of Moldova having done a single thing to surprise me since the Moldovan NF performance, and this pleases me. If you already know in February how you want to do things in May, then stick with your first answer. Quite right too. Visually arresting, interestingly composed, a total contrast to what’s gone before it, it’ll take off in a full arena and like it or not it’ll attract support on the night(s).
Ukraine would be the core of a really excellent postcard concept if it was two minutes shorter.
Slovakia’s finally loaded for me, and well – for two minutes I was just a bit bored with the song and wondering if the Spice Girls would be reforming to release another really tedious Christmas number 1 c. 1998 anytime soon, or at least two of them, and then my eyes were literally pulled into the screen (not literally, obviously, that would be painful and probably a bit gory) by the drummer. Oh, you’ve got to watch that drummer! He’s just got that look on his face that says “I spent three long years doing drum studies at the Bratislava School of Performing and Dramatic Arts, and I end up doing THIS in front of 25 million people who are probably in the toilet anyway… I’ve wasted my life.” Only in Slovakian, obviously. Dearie me.
I need a lie down before I come back for Netherlands, Bosnia and the one between Netherlands and Bosnia now.
I must point out at this point, that this is observations from the ESCDaily Video and may well be altered by the time I see a different video later.
It is safe to say that Eric has flown in today and is protecting his voice, certainly, but the performance, such as it is, raises rather more questions than answers for me. Firstly, why hide the 2 backing singers left and right of shot? are they that ugly?, or is it a ploy to give him wonder-bra support (see what I did there) when it comes to the singing. I further hear that he has fecked his shoulder as well and has been spotted wincing, the boy isn’t getting any more lucky as the rehearsal session is going on is he?!
I asked an accredited journalist on a scale of 0-10, 0 being sub-optimal, where it was placed as he was seeing them live and contacting us at the same time. “2” was the reply. This could well be in danger of not qualifying, alternatively with a better voice and some rest, it could be up there…. It’s just MEH at the moment and if this is what Europe will see (plus a substandard voice) it has no chance – although I suspect it wont be what Europe sees!
Sweden is the last rehearsal today. I’m tired, so I’ll keep things short. It will qualify.
Nick: Someone next to me just said “Right, are we going home yet? I’m tired and I need to eat”. Yeah, fair enough. So I shall just reluctantly concede that we just saw a pretty much spot-on rehearsal of a song that I don’t like very much.
Reading the day back, I seem to have been insulting just about everyone. Overtired, obviously. And not high on a mountain top in Bergen looking down on a tiny little town made all out of Lego and Meccano. With the sun at my back. And half-price ice cream. And a little Christmas shop. And more Indian restaurants and barbers than you could shake a stick at. And a massive great fountain in the middle of a huge water feature, and fjords. And benches and parks where tattooed Norwegians do bicycle tricks and practice roundhouse kicks. And mysterious pine forests with trolls and rickety rope bridges and ominously discarded gloves. And… can we go round again?
The bad news with Sweden is that she does that singing thing. And by that I mean the song. I just don’t get it. Now I appreciate that its a woman of few years, looking at me and singing with her guitar, but she is no female Tom Dice and that is its only comparable song on the contest for me. I think it relies too much on the light stick gimmick thing to deflect from a weak song and Anna doesn’t do anything visually to sell the song to me in the way of movement or girlish charm.
Admittedly it was performed well, but I still think the lack of quality in the song and the fact that it is too early in the semi and the kind of thing that is an album track and not a stand-out sng is not going to help it. It probably will qualify, just but then again it’s just as likely to miss out big time.
Franko: Folk on here and back home know that I haven’t been overly fond of more recent Swedish entries. Their lack of imagination and originality in recent years has been quite frustrating, especially when I know that there was better on offer in their national final. I really wanted that fine tradition to continue but find to my surprise that I’m actually quite impressed by this year’s entry from our favourite scandie schlagermeisters.
In the same way that less was more for Belgium so it is with this. Anna and guitar centre stage letting the song speak for itself. It was never my favourite song, but in this context it works and could wrack up a few points. It’s not a winner by any stretch but bravo for the effort this year Sweden!
Nick: Can’t quite see it with Sweden. First reaction was what a nice change of pace it was, then she started doing that voicey thing she does, then it just seemed to be dragging on a bit so I gave up and went off for a croissant.
Franko: After the first four there was a lunch break which gave me time to try one of the Belorussian ice creams and nip to the 24 mini mart (not realising there was a cafe with perfectly good hot food in the midst of the press centre – doh). The afternoon could be long…..
Here come Sweden . There are five backing dancers dressed in black against a green background who later hold up masks to their faces to keep in with the operatic theme. Our main singer is dressed in a long white gown with a dead swan at the bottom of it. She manages to nail the operatic notes but sounds horribly out of tune the rest of time. She’s not the prettiest woman in the world. Note quite Charlotte-esque hideous but certainly looking her age and shinning in the glare of the many lights on stage which isn’t attractive.
At best this is borderline qualification which I can see happening but it will totally bomb in the harsh reality of the final if it gets there.
Phil: Sweden are not going to be even close to qualifying. Her vocal is just too week, especially on the high notes which were more off-key than on. She looks very VERY scary in HD (and some say technological advances are a good thing!) and she screeches and literall scares the living bejesus out of me. The stage will be very green, but the general gasps of hideousness in the press centre are there for all to see.
The Juries are NOT going to be able to save this one!!