Finland
Phil: This is an odd one. It’s rather like Marmite – you either love it or hate it… At the moment – I love it, principally because the bloke himself – good old Jari – is a damn good performer – but the song seems out of place in this arena. Now don’t get me wrong – he sounds and performs fantastically – the Choreography with the backing singers ACTUALLY tango-ing really helps ( pictures to come later) , the man is vocally superb – in every run through and despite the protestations of people in this group, however, I CAN see it getting through to the final – principally because it is TOTALLY different to anything around it rather than on merit. Though do keep an eye out for the man on the keyboard and the Come Dancing people in the background!!
Nick: Yesterday evening was quite an experience. A fascinating rush hour taxi ride home led to the conclusion that the Highway Code in Turkey contains five words: “Get a car. Drive it.”. On the other hand, it seems to work in a strange way and we got back to our luxurious hotel in one piece. Even better, in fact, we got back in three separate pieces. We then indulged in a buffet supper which was both delicious and extremely delicious. I think I could live on Turkish food for a week and a half, which is probably just as well as I’m going to anyway. So, Jari Sillanpaa. What do you expect me to say? I make no pretence at neutrality or lack of bias here, he is fabulous. No, he’s more than fabulous, he is phenomenal. He’s like a cross between Martin Bell and Dale Winton. He sings! He dances! (sort of). He has more dancers interpreting the lyrics in a frighteningly literal manner – as he sings “angels falling” they crouch! As he sings “demons rising” they stand up again! Fab with a capital fab, and don’t believe any P1s (spit!) on the OnEurope team who tell you anything different! If I were going to compare this song with Sanomi, I would have to say that it’s absolutely nothing like it.
Michelle: I like the look of Jari Silanpaa – ok, I think the white suit is a muck magnet but he is just nicely proportioned (/female lust). Song is well staged and it just looks good. He is smashing.
Belarus
Nick: Alexandra and Konstantin … or, as I prefer to think of them, Sharon and Dave from down the Dog and Duck. I like them. It’s a fascinating and deep lyric… I think. He looks like he’s trying to look like he knows how to mime playing a guitar, and does it tremendously well. Three people stand in the background looking suspiciously like Fredi’s backing singers from Pump Pump, and it actually has a certain something in spite of my best attempts to diss it. There are six people on stage. Some have instruments. A woman sings in a manner not reminiscent of any known language. In spite of this, it doesn’t succeed in being very much like Sanomi, in this correspondent’s opinion.
Phil: This has a definite something – it might be the sanomi-esque feel about the song – it could be that they look like Kenny Rodgers and Dolly Parton on crack or, more likely, it could be a damn good song! This is very dangerous in the right hands and that might be theirs. The performance is somewhat understated with the backing singers to the right of stage – the 2 performers in the middle and a shell playing blokie on the left ( in another Homage to previous Belgian entries). Vocally strong – but lyrically weak. *if* this gets through ( and it is a big if) it could be a danger… possibly to the English Language!
Michelle: Now, what can I say ? I like it because my friend Roy does. But it irritates me. Greatly.
Portugal
Nick: At this time of the contest, you’re really looking for something to get the party started. What Piero has delivered is something that not only gets the party started but immediately gets it raided by special branch and all the guests taken into custody. You can’t say it didn’t have movement. The stage looks really fantastic for this one. (copyright Mr T Wogan, every year since the year dot). Last year I tipped Sanomi to finish last. This song is very Sanomiesque in some regards.
Phil: Nick has said almost everything. It IS as bad as he says and it IS awful. He performs like a 70’s disco dancer to a 70’s disco track. He doesn’t inspire me to clap my hands – more like SLOW clap my hands to get rid of him. There is an old adage that sometimes three minutes is too long – in this instance three SECONDS is too much – He tries to be a combination of Tanel and Dave without the Talent and the backers COULD have been 2XL if you stretch your imagination past the warped world that we live in. Everyone this aint … winner it isn’t – on this performance (which consists of Piero strutting round his mic squawking and the dancers doing Moonwalks and back flips and looking generally uninterested and NOT wanting to clap their hands) 36th?? Distinctly!!
Latvia
Michelle: Yes, that’s not a misnomer. This is as near to rock as you’ll get here.My drummer friend is very impressed by the two drum kits on stage.The vocals are spot on and the jump the lead singer does at the start just amazes me. They were so good we wanted to clap when they signaled to do so – unlike Switzerland … Apparently the ocarina player for Belarus fell off the back of the stage and has been taken to hospital. I hope he’s OK. Although it is my job to do the falling.
Phil: This isn’t half bad you know… old Formins and Kleins have “done a number” on this one since the Final and boy does it show. 2 old rockers – Not one but 2 drummers and 2 backing singers really do attack the pants off this song – even the fact that it IS in Latvian does not detract in any way!! (which I thought it would do) They belt around the stage with great speed for the older man – and do a very nice job of selling it to the crowd. Now these pair *do* clap their hands – and the assembled throng did too, without being told 329048209 times to “clap your hands”. The part of the press we were sitting with Likes this – a definite qualifier we think – and it may do very well in the final , if it gets out of this bloodbath that IS the Semi Final!
Nick: This actually rocks to a reasonably acceptable extent. Fomins (or possibly Kleins) opens up by jumping off his drum-kit, at which point he clearly thinks “Oh… that’s a little bit too E-Type isn’t it? I know, I’ll shag my mic stand instead”, and then he gives up that idea as well and does his own thing for the rest of the song, and it works pretty well. The set’s dressed up in black and whites, and they really get the crowd going. I’ll grant you that the crowd is about seven of us, but when he invites us to clap our hands we actually DO. Like it. It’s credible and good. Just like Sanomi, this song is not sung in Portuguese.
Israel
Nick: I’ve heard his soundcheck so far, which sounded reasonably impressive. He looks surprisingly small, but that might be merely because I’m surprisingly big. The guy’s got a heck of a pair of lungs on him, and there’s a harpist and three vital backing singers who stay out of the way and let him get on with it – though performing some arm movements which we suspect is international sign language. It’s such an acquired taste to hear falsetto singing though, and I’m not sure that there’s enough interest in the song to carry it along… if you like it though, he doesn’t let anybody down. I don’t think the ongoing Sanomi comparison gag has many more legs left on it so I’ll quietly drop it at this point without drawing anyone’s attention to the fact, and hope no-one notices
Michelle: David D’Or – what can I say ? Not a big fanof falsetto, getting on for castrato … Nah, not my cup of tea. ‘Nuff said.
Andorra
Michelle: We thought Portugal were coming after Israel – obviously wanting to torture ourselves a bit more. But it’s Andorra and it’s slick and wonderful and energetic and nostalgic but it works. We love it. That is not the royal we either ! I wanna dance…oh yeah. Oh, sorry – that was 17 years ago.Still sums it up for me!
Nick: I’m a bit fazed here. I was fully expecting – and indeed bracing myself for – a dose of Foi Magia. Mostly because I haven’t memorised the running order properly. Instead, the wonderful Marta Roure and the equally wonderful Bis a Bis and two fellows who I don’t really know who they are turned up. I’m now utterly stunned by their sheer wonderfulness. It’s not *really* an eighties song and performance, yet there’s enough there to warm the cockles of this aging child of 80s ESC. They dance energetically though not wildly – enough of that later on. Fantastic. It’s a K’dam song from the golden years. I hadn’t seen this coming at all but I really like it now. DANGEROUS FLOATER ALERT!!!!
Phil: Andorra was FANTASTIC and – as a MF 85 boi – I don’t think i can stress just how good this was – bouncy , full of non-groundbreaking choreography – plenty of nice things for the hetero and homo communities to keep an eye on – she and her entourage bounce around the vast stage and keep you focused on the song – which – whilst being cheesy and 80’s Is fantastic and ends with the “hands in the air”
Portugal
Nick: After the Lord Mayor’s Show comes the dustcart. I haven’t travelled thousands of miles to have a woman shout “foi magia” at me over and over again… I could do that at home! *forces self to watch the stage show* No. No. People who like this song will like it just fine, and if there are actually any out there please feel free to insult me in the space below!
Monaco
Phil: Isn’t half bad – its it , however , only half good! She does come on draped in Last Year’s xmas tree lights ( really!) they then get whipped off and , today, she was in a White blouse and a red top. Its very choreographed, they start on the floor – then get up – then dance around her – she then moves to the right of the stage to well very little effect to be honest. As has been said on many occassions “nice” doesnt win the Eurovision – and this is no exception – it might, just might, get into the top 10 and therefore into the contest proper – but there is no saying. There is the obligatory one lone backing singer that is not with the rest of them on the left – poor her – she must smell LOL
Michelle: Just does nothing for me
Nick: I can’t help thinking that I’m sitting here watching Monaco rehearse, and you know what came to mind almost immediately? I thought “Hang on, I haven’t done Malta yet”. I blame the cakes that I’ve been watching everyone else indulge in whilst I’ve been being (good/cheap*) * delete as applicable. I have taken photographs… it is food pornography in its purest form. Which brings me, somewhat laterally, to Ludwig and Julie. I do like their backdrop – they’re in what ESC veterans will recognise as Marija Naumova’s garden. They don’t actually do a lot really except sing the song really quite well. Unsure whether that will be enough now, but I always have these little doubts creep in round about now. Then we’re watching Monaco. The back-projection is of a spinning globe, and I’m glad to report that there’s nothing in the staging that will remotely detract from the important message of the song. *removes hand from mouth* I’d really rather leave it as a surprise, though no doubt it won’t be come next Wednesday when you see it on the telly (or in Istanbul if you happen to be coming)
Greece
Phil: As usual – a Contest can not go by without offending the Greeks – so here we go again!! Now Sakis is, I am sure – as worthy a 3/1 favourite as any 3/1 favourite should be – but seriously now folks – if you are gonna bet on him WITHOUT seeing the performance then … frankly you should get what you deserve! Now he does do all the things you like – he does a cartwheel and he strips and he strips his dancers and the backing sings do funny little movements with their legs and i can see it justifying its 1/20 to get to the final – what you who backed him because he was Greek and, quite possibly “your” man is:
a) He missed high notes
b) He doesnt have a presence on stage ( not like the next lot!)
c) He doesnt have a hope in hell of winning – with or without a block vote
Harsh I know, and yes, is only my opinion, and yes, i fully expect 1/2 of the Greek speaking world to turn on me with a vengeance BUT and it is a big BUT – there are better songs , both none qualifiers and qualifiers by right – he will perform it well and he will pick up votes and, most probably, will get through – but in the final…. doubtful at best! Sorry
Michelle: Vocally, fine. Visually,another matter. ERT can do better.
Nick: We are all stunned by this performance.
We can’t find sufficient superlatives.
It is astonishing from start to finish.
Amazing, amazing, amazing.
(plenty of space left between lines so you can read between them)
Ukraine
Phil: This is how a favourite should be – it’s uptempo – its catchy – it has the hetro’s and the Poofs going “Cor blimey” for the same and differing reasons. Ruslana IS not only a Diva – she’s a Real woman AND can really sell this song – From the moment it starts to the moment it finishes its 3 minutes of Drama, good singing, banging Digeridoos on the floor, stamping, lifting fun that will make the Men of the world on Thursday go “Fucking hell did you see that” and the Women and gay blokes to go ” I want to be Ruslana”. There is 12/1 about this in some bookmakers… GET IT NOW… Cos this should not be that big – this SHOULD be the favourite. This was, without question, the BEST thing I have seen at a Eurovision since Sertab Erener (!) – but seriously this has to be one of the best songs in many a long year…. IT IS FANTASTIC.
Nick: I wonder what Kiev’s like at this time of year?
Michelle: Wow. Just wow. She is amazing. Nothing more can be said. Just watch me bet and watch this go mad.