I took the morning off before we move house, just so I could take some pics of the nieghbourhood and generally catch up with myself. But I’ve just had the curious post modern pleasure of sitting in the hotel, watching Keith Mill’s camera pointing at a TV in the press centre, showing the goings on in the hall, and trying to work out how many times diminished from the real experience that actually was, before quietly imploding into a puff of smoke.
So from my grainy viewpoint, Iceland looks like a quaintly adequate old skool starter. He still looks shiny, she still looks chubbily cute and it does what used to win the contest a decade ago very well. I’m still of the view that a big up pop song’s going to win it, and I wouldn’t begrudge this one if it did. But I’m not at apoplectic about it as some of our colleagues.
Sweden looks strangely static – and that’s not just her face. A big Christmas schlager song done with apple pie folding, it’s so precise that you can hardly see the joins. Sadly unlike Charlotte Perelli‘s ‘work’ which with the traditional Swedish wind will be scaring children Europe wide in their nightmares for many months to come. At least Lordi were cuddly. No seriously, rather than the good burghers of Europe going ‘lovely lovely gal’ when she’s singing, they’ll be remarking on the quality of her surgeon and wondering how much restorative work she’ll need doing when the lift slips.
Turkey and Ukraine, by all accounts, was pretty tastiness – but I don’t believe a word of it. I’ll tell ye da truths the day after tomorrow.
Ooh, and in other news, I just got arrested. I followed a local across the road in a no-zebra area and got picked up for jaywalking by a couple of fresh faced cops clearly on the make. They tried to fine me 2000 dinari, but when I laughed at them they looked hurt, told me not to do it again, gave me my passport back, shook my hand and sent me on my way. But for those of you coming over who might not be as frightening looking as I, I’d advise keeping an eye out for the filth when you cross the road in the wrong place, cos you may not be as lucky as I.
Off to our new hovel now. Don’t miss us too much.