Rosé: Por dios, that’s a lot to do in 3 minutes!
Oh Spain. This is wonderful but for all the wrong reasons, pure entertainment and you’re in for an absolute treat next Saturday. I don’t quite know where to begin with this. Never have I seen so much go on in three minutes, so much that you actually forget there’s a song being sung. Edurne is beautiful, stunning in fact and holds the vocal very well considering all that’s being thrown at her. She starts off wrapped around the hunky sleeping dancer, he’s holding onto her red caped dress, she tries to escape, he tugs her back, she relents and gives up the red shawl as he tugs some more and reveals a green and gold dress with gladatior esque sandals up to the knee. Before running off with the 10m length of red cloth he throws her around with gay abandon for the second chorus but only after doing a comedy somersault and collapses panting on the floor. I’m left panting after this my jaw on the floor. Whoever put this together really was ambitious, and cruel to be brutally frank. This is fabulous entertainment and the party audience watching at home next Saturday will be loving it. The Spaniards thought this was an arty staging, they’ve only succeeded in providing three minutes of, dare I say, comedy? This is what Eurovision is all about..
Nick: Amanecer – part song, part breakfast TV opening titles
“Dear ÖRF,
Our song is called Amanecer. It means Sunrise, in Foreign. Our rough plan is that we’ll start dark, like it’s just before sunrise, then our singer will wear a big red sunrise coloured frock, then after a couple of minutes, a hunky dancer will rip that away to reveal a more spangly morning sun goldy coloured kind of frock, then we’ll dance around a bit and go E-A-E-A-O and then the song finishes. Can you do an appropriate backdrop, maybe with a bit of forest but not too much forest?
Love,
RTVE”
Fair play, the Spanish knew what they wanted and got what they wanted, which is a nice little dramatic interlude with literal overtones. If Amanecer is the breakfast news on RTVE, they’ve got a nice new theme music in a bucket with this. Pleasant enough. Might top 10. Not troubling the podium.
Monty: ¿Cómo se dice en español ‘kitchen sink’?
OMG! Spain is HILARIOUS! Although not intentionally so…
Edurne begins cloaked in red, sat channelling Mary Magdalene as she cradles a risen Christ in her lap. It’s very dark and brooding. She stands up and does some elementary mime movements and then her topless Jesus is up and clutching at her long red cape behind her. He tugs it until it reaches its full length (I’m still talking about the cape here, you understand) and there’s a gasp around the press centre as we realise there’s a Madonna moment in the making. Sure enough he gives it a good yank (the cape! Concentrate, will you?) and off it safely comes revealing a gold gown, slit to the thigh, with strapping all up her calves from her shoes. There follows all manner of complicated choreography with Edurne being held aloft and whirled around his head in moves she seems not yet quite sure of what’s coming next. The sculpted messiah does a dash off the stage with her cloak just before the end and Edurne’s stood there looking a little bit ungainly. To be fair it’s kept the attention of the press room as nobody could take their eyes off either of the first two runs through, but there were a number of spontaneous guffaws at several would-be key moments. Oh my. This is going to be remembered. For none of the right reasons. I almost forgot there was even a song going on…
Monty x
Phil: Dear RTVE…..
Once… JUST ONCE…. could you please do something SENSIBLE with your very average entry. You get all the Spanish “Press” in the press centre all excited for nothing.
It starts with Edurne dressed up in Youdipph’s outfit from the dressing up box, which then gets whipped off by a muscled backing singer as the background looks like she is going through the wash cycle at Dot’s Launderette. Followed then by Sertab Erener esque fiddling with the dress and the rest gets whipped off.
She then seems to totally ignore the camera and with the wind machine on, braces herself against the wind as though it’s a Force 10 gale, then we get the Interpretative Dance section to confuse the voters and she sings in an Ice Skating lift position before the camp as tits dancer gets thrown to the floor, gathers the washing up and runs off stage.
Cue more bracing against the wind and ends up going into the sun as she disappears up her own arse.
I have never in all my life seen something so hideous that’s supposed to be so serious and thought out. Clearly David De Gea sees something in her…. so to speak, but TVE’s Styling och Consulting department are clearly “Having a laugh” with this. Deliberate Last??