… Or ‘The Best Worst Two Hours Of My Life‘.
Having been surprised in Helsinki a year ago, we got to the arena in good time to join the 500 or so people who eventually took their seats to enjoy the show. Clearly things were already amiss, as the start time was put back to 15:05 and then to 15:08, and sound problems beset the linking parts of the show throughout.
The opening is nice, standard-issue Eurovision fare, featuring an imaginative angle on the opening Te Deum, and bits of Congratulations, Waterloo and Volare played by a jazz band in the almost unrecognisable stylee. Jovana and Zeljko don’t overstay their welcome, and we’re into the Montenegro postcard very quickly.
I like the postcards. They pull off the trick of being very very similar, yet at the same time very very individual. Expect to see lots of sport, art and circus acts going on, all on the same basic set.
Montenegro is an OK starter, nothing special; Israel I can’t tell whether it’s being sung well or not, as it’s not a musical oeuvre that I understand.
Estonia, for me, died a death – but that could just be because one of the three had a failing microphone. Moldova, neither intimate nor cosy.
San Marino is better in the arena than it’s looked on TV. It’s got that big bass-notes-that-get-in-the-pit-of-your-stomach thing going on, and it’s the first time so far that I’ve rated it at all. Belgium gets the punters going nicely, and could actually make some progress.
Commercial break/short film, which was ruined by sound problems on this run. Ana Ivanovic introduces some footage of Belgrade, over an instrumental arrangement of Molitva.
Azerbaijan – to me it’s just blokes screaming. I can’t judge it on the merits that I know it has. Slovenia initially looked like it was improving, but it isn’t.
Norway – good, well-performed, classy. Poland also was, except that Isis has infeasibly big teeth which rendered the remainder of the song impossible to take seriously.
A long technical interruption now; the hosts will be saying a few words as they have to get Isis’s teeth off stage and Dustin on.
Ireland was Ireland. Cameras are definitely messy – they keep showing the people who aren’t singing at the time, and it’s very off-putting. Andorra was awful.
Bosnia’s superb. It could easily win the whole thing for me, though other opinions are available.
Armenia’s not bad, but the Netherlands is better. If they’re not both here on Saturday though, I shall start to wonder about this contest.
Finland – very very good. Halfway competent may be all that’s needed to clear this semi, and they’re a lot better than that. Romania’s very good as a contrast, too.
Russia – I think Dima’s taken some advice about his diction, he’s not deeming the light within or finding anything impaaassseeeebulll any more. I still think he’s overselling it though.
Greece – should get through on competency alone, but looks very very odd as the only song between a commercial break and the end of the running order.
I’ve previously estimated that about 60 points will be needed to clear this level. I’m reducing my estimate. By the time I’ve boiled it all down, I think there are going to be six or seven songs that are completely un-votable. It only needs three of the others to go wrong and someone’s going to qualify on about 6 points!
There are many, many people with a great deal of work to do between now and 21:00 CET. And I’m not one of them. Hurrah!