Cyprus – Hi, is that Finland … can we borrow your kitchen sink?


I’ve just sat with most of Europe’s fan and web press as they gave this a massive round of applause on its first run-through.

‘Fuego’ knows what it is – a high-camp performance, with lots of dancing, long hair, tunnels of lasers (a la 1993 opening sequence), fire graphics that come out of Eleni’s arse like she is Mrs Methane and  – we hear – real fire as well … just to let you know it’s called ‘Fuego’. (Fire, dontcha know). She’s also wearing what could be described as a dress of very little substance, and is shaking what her mother gave her.

It’s light on musical substance, and I say that as a lover of uptempo songs. It’s identikit Greece circa mid-2000’s, and I’m not sure if that is a good thing, a bad thing or just a thing.

This is qualifying though because it appeals to the lowest common denominator, the Eurovision fan (and viewer that believes that this *is* Eurovision), the wider question should be “If it gets to the final, is this what Europe want?”

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